Betrayal and Redemption
by AquilaTempestas
Summary: The hatred burns inside, and the flame never seems to die. As long as he breathes, he suffers. Anders/Hawke(F)/Sebastian


**Disclaimer**

The rights to Dragon Age don't belong to me, unfortunately. That belongs to BioWare.

**Title**

Betrayal and Redemption

**Summary**

The hatred burns inside, and the flame never seems to die. As long as he breathes, he suffers.

**.**

**Chapter One: A Risky Plan**

_You know what must be done._

Anders paced back and forth in his clinic, debating with Justice about his plans for the future. The plan was absurd – outrageous – suicidal even, but perhaps it might just work. The treatment of mages was only worsening, and no one, not even the Champion of Kirkwall wanted to help. The Champion was expected to bring peace to the city, but she had only succeeded in strengthening the templar's hold on Kirkwall, condemning mages to their deaths. If she had been a warrior, or even a rogue, he would've naturally expected that she would be blind to the faults of mages, but she was a mage!

Thinking of Marian Hawke made his blood boil. She was a traitor to all mages. She was nothing but Meredith's pet. "She doesn't understand; I need to make her understand," he said, continuing to walk back and forth. "Meredith will cast her aside when she is done using Marian."

_Those who harm mages must be killed._

"No!" Anders said. "She's confused, that's all. And who would blame her after everything that she has had to endure?" he added bitterly, recalling the death of Hawke's mother. Slain by magic. No wonder Hawke turned against her own kind. Mages were dangerous. "I will make her understand." He was determined to make the Champion see some sense.

"Make her understand what?"

Anders froze. He glanced to his right and spotted Hawke walking towards him, a sly grin on her face. He noticed that her favourite companions, Fenris, Varric and Sebastian, were not standing with her. Good. Without them around, perhaps he had a better chance of changing her mind. "Hawke! I was not expecting you."

The Champion shrugged, flicking a strand of dark hair away from her emerald eyes. "I wanted to share some good news with you." Anders looked hopeful for brief second; had she finally accepted mages needed to be saved and not condemned? "Sebastian and I are now married," she said, crushing his hopes.

"You married Sebastian?" Anders repeated slowly, unsure of how to respond. What exactly did Hawke see in the blasted ranger he did not know. It wasn't as if there was any real showing of love between them; Sebastian loved the Chantry; Hawke did not. How on earth could they love each other enough to be married? It must have been a political choice.

Hawke frowned. "You don't approve?"

"It's just... surprising that's all."

She smiled. "I'm a Sister of the Chantry now."

Anders almost fell over from the shock of hearing those words. Marian Hawke, mage Champion of Kirkwall had given herself over to the Chantry willingly? What madness was this? "You are a mage," he said.

"Thanks for pointing out the obvious, Anders, as if I wasn't aware of that," she said bluntly. "Sebastian and I love each other very much, so it made perfect sense to become husband and wife."

Not too Anders it didn't. Mages marrying non-mages wasn't unheard of, but it was frowned upon. There was always a fear mage children would be born to the parents and taken away to the Circle to spend the rest of their lives in captivity. But a mage marrying a dedicated Chantry boy who just happened to be an exiled Prince? Surely, this had to be some cruel joke? "Congratulations, then."

"I know you don't like him very much, but you don't seem to like anyone in our little party anyway," Hawke pointed out, frowning slightly. "I just thought you would like to know. I should probably head back to the estate – I need to prepare for more fights with blood mages." She turned her back to him, and started walking towards the door, when Anders called out her name.

"Hawke!"

_What are you doing?_

He ignored Justice. "Please, we must talk."

"About the plight of the mages, right?" she said, tone laced with thick sarcasm. Fenris and Sebastian had been a bad influence on Hawke – even her own brother had expressed some concern about her decisions to hurt her own kind. "I don't turn against my own kind for thrills, Anders, I'm only doing it because I don't see any other way." She gave him a defeated look.

"We should be saving them, not hurting them! What would your sister think? She was a mage."

The mention of Bethany's name brought back hurtful memories for Hawke; Anders could see it in her eyes. The regret, the pain. He knew that look all too well having felt that way numerous times. "Bethany would be disappointed in me," Hawke finally said, her shoulders slumping, "Even my own brother doubts me now. But after what happened to my mother – how can I willingly protect my own kind when many choose to use blood magic to do terrible things? I'm sorry, Anders, but it's for the best."

_She is a traitor to the mages, she must be killed._

"No... I won't do as you say..." Anders muttered.

"It's Justice again, isn't it? I guess he doesn't approve of my ways," Hawke said, looking concerned. She took a step toward him, reaching out a hand as if to comfort him. Something inside him snapped. His eyes flashed blue, and before he could stop himself, he cast a Winter's Grasp. Hawke responded immediately, summoning a barrier to defend herself. "Anders!"

_She must die!_

Anders aimed his staff at her, casting elemental bolts at her. Justice was screaming in his head, demanding vengeance for the mistreatment of mages. When Justice was in a passionate rage, regaining control was extremely difficult. Anders could hear his own voice faintly, begging for control, but Anders was long gone. He swung his staff, clearing any obstacle near him.

"Anders, you must regain control," Hawke said. "I am not your enemy."

_Justice must be served!_

Anders prepared to attack again, when he was struck by an arrow. The blue light in his eyes faded, replaced by the normal shade of brown. He glanced down at the arrow piercing his right shoulder, and winced. Of course, it wasn't something he concerned himself with; he was a gifted healer, and the wound could easily be fixed.

"Are you alright, Hawke?" Sebastian said, glancing at his wife, his brow furrowed with concern.

Hawke nodded. "I'm fine."

Sebastian didn't look quite certain, but didn't argue the matter further with the Champion. Instead, he fixed his steely gaze on Anders, eyes burning with hatred. If it wasn't for the presence of Hawke, Anders suspected Sebastian would've killed him on the spot. A part of him wished the archer would. At least Justice would finally be set free. "Leave."

"Sebastian... let me talk to him. He is troubled," Hawke said soothingly.

Sebastian frowned. "He tried to kill you."

"He's confused, its Justice speaking, not Anders. Please, let me talk to him."

The archer gave Anders another hateful look, but stepped away at the request of his wife. He walked up to Anders, lent forward and whispered in his ear, "If you dare lay one hand on her, I _swear _I will kill you." With that said, Sebastian walked away. Once the archer had left, Hawke came over to Ander's side.

"Justice is growing stronger, isn't he? I can see the change within you."

"You are right," Anders whispered, defeated, "Mages _are _dangerous. _I _am dangerous. You should kill me before I cause more harm." He wanted to kick himself for losing control once again. He had almost killed Hawke. Almost murdered another mage who wasn't an abomination.

Hawke shook her head. "I'm not going to kill you, Anders. You've been a loyal friend to me despite our differences."

_She is your weakness._

Hawke? His weakness? No. No that wasn't right. Hawke kept him sane. Hawke stopped him from killing that innocent mage back in the caves. It was a damn shame her mind had been corrupted by Sebastian and Fenris, otherwise... otherwise they might've had a future together. Possibly. "You do not agree with my views, yet you still stand with me." He wanted to hate her; she was a traitor, a hypocrite, but he couldn't.

"You haven't given me a reason to kill you yet," she said lightly, trying to brighten up the mood.

Perhaps there was still a slight chance he could convince her mind. He took a deep breath. "I need your help. I believe there is a way to separate Justice and I, but it requires a few ingredients from the surrounding places," he said, knowing fully well his words were a lie. But Hawke didn't know that.

She looked at him with great suspicion. "You didn't mention it before?"

"It wasn't the right time. I had to know if it was possible."

"Well, anything that can separate you from Justice will be fine with me. What do I have to do?"

Her acceptance of helping him took him by surprise. They argued over pretty much everything, but she agreed to this. He felt bad for lying to her, but he wanted her aid. Then when it happened... she'd understand his actions better. Reaching a hand down into his robes, he pulled out a piece of parchment and gave it to Hawke. Her eyes widened, as her read through the text. "Sounds risky. I'll bring Fenris and Sebastian."

They were the last two people Anders wanted coming along. "No, not them."

Hawke lifted a brow, waiting expectantly for an answer, but one did not come. She sighed. "Alright then, I'll bring Aveline and Varric with us. You do realize both Fenris and Sebastian are going to be suspicious? I'll have to think of a convincing lie to tell them." She looked troubled.

"Come alone," he blurted.

_See the look on her face? She distrusts you._

"When do we leave?"

"Now. We don't have much time to waste." Every minute wasted, meant another minute of mage abuse. He wasn't going to stand aside and do nothing no longer. This is the one good thing I can do with my life, he thought bitterly. "When this is over, Hawke. I hope you understand why I did what I did," he mumbled, then headed towards the opposite side of Darktown to begin the search, Hawke following close behind.

**.**

This story is going to be an AndersxHawkexSebastian love triangle just because I love them all. I've written another Dragon Age fic about Hawke/Sebastian with a dead Anders, so I wanted to write one in which Anders was alive and well. Reviews are greatly appreciated!


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